Tres Leche Cake

Heehee..i've wanted to put this up here in my blog..but i've no computer to use lah. Neways, i made my FIRST cake ever and it's called 'tres leche' which means 'three milk' in Spanish. It's basically just white cake with 3 kinds of milk mixed together and poured over the cake that has holes made in it to absorb the milk. So, it's a wet kind of cake..it's sweet, but i personally like it very much.

I made it the other day on the 16th of June for my friend's birthday..and i think it's quite successful because even Thomas liked it (i think he has high expectations for food..somewhat, i think*haha*)

Mixing the cake mix at wee hours in the morning..

Baked cake...!!! Taadaaa!!! "Tres Leche cake"...

The next cake i wanna make is cheesecake. I dunno when i can do that with my crazy 40 hours work schedule now. But..i'm excited!! =))

chef wannabe?? ...pheng

New Arrival

Hey ya'll!! I've just received my "NEW" laptop TODAY!! The old laptop that my brother gave me kinda 'died' some time ago..showing prominent signs of old age. So, now i have this Sony Vaio laptop to use. I bought it from Seul Kee (Thomas's roomate) for a reasonable price. It's about a year old, still running very welll. What a blessing..thank you Lord. I recognize that all good and perfect gift comes from our Father above..so yes, thank you Lord.

This will make communication easier for me. I've been a little out of touch from the cyber world. Now, i can write and reply emails easier and faster. woohooo..

thanks Dear for 'fixing' this pc for me. i appreciate it! =)

pheng..

Is there more??

I've just been discouraged lately..very discouraged actually for the past month or so about youth ministry in my church here in America. It's been so difficult that i 'feel' ready to go home. Yet a part of me know that i'll be here for a little while longer for education purposes. After i'm done with school, i'll be more than exhilarated to go home. i am so ready to go back to ministry as i know it.

Youth ministry here has been discouraging in many ways. There is NO prayer involved in this ministry watsoever. There's no emphasis on that. There seem to be no dependence on God and the Holy Spirit. It feels like a machine..just running and running simply because it has to. There's not much or any place for God to come in. Events are planned to fill in the summer break. More fun oriented than God-oriented. After all, aren't we supposed to be the church and not an entertainment bazar?

There's no opportunity for youth to respond after service..rarely. There's no ministry like i know it..ministry-you know? Like laying hands, praying for people, hearing from God on their behalf and release words of knowledge/ prophecy/ affirmation/ encouragement/ rebuke even!!

VISION!! Without vision, my people cast off restrain. There is no vision for the youth! The leaders have no vision, no name for the youth group. The task of naming the youth group is casually tossed to the young people to create or cook up something 'cool'. What about God in the picture? What does God have in His heart for this group of youth here in Dallas, Texas? I'm sure it's our responsibilty as LEADERS to cast a vision and challenge people to catch it, and run with it. I'm sure there is a purpose to everything..how much more for this generation that's dying and LOST?

Yes, God wants me here in this youth group..for this season of time. BUT what am i doing? i don't preach, don't minister or pray for people..*hardly* so tell me, what am i here for? Lord, what am i here for? what is my role? this is so sad..it is horrible!! I don't know how long this will go on..but Lord please, do something..either with me or with the leadership..or show up Lord. How i miss being in your presence with people who hunger for more of you. Am i judgmental on the youth here..or the leadership? I don't want to..but it's so hard..

I'm sure there's more to this madness? Or is this all meaningless and vain as Soloman says it. At the end of the day, what's important is to fear you and keep Your commands right? And if i believe that You have CALLED and PLACED me here in this ministry and in this church, then i want to obey..but again, please Lord pleaseeee..do something. I NEED YOU, we need you, the leadership needs you, the YOUTH needs you, America needs You Lord!!

frustrated, disillusioned & discouraged.
*tears* take me home Lord..pheng

His Everlasting Love

Ever wondered how God can love the person you see in the mirror each day?
Ever felt as though it's still such a long way to go untill you finally become a little more Christ-like?
Ever felt like God made a mistake creating you?
Ever felt like you've let God down so many times that you don't deserve another shot at it?

Those are just thoughts..not necessarily are all mine. Was looking at some of the pics in Tom's laptop..was reflecting a little. These thoughts hit me..that God REALLY, and i mean REALLY honestly think that He did a good job after creating each person on planet earth. He looks at a blob of mess birthed out of a womb and say that we are wonderfully and fearfully made. Even years down the road..when some of us are still a big blob of mess..He STILL thinks the same toward us. I don't know..it just hit me once again, that God really likes me..in spite of me, in spite of the terrible things i do, think or feel..He likes me, He LOVES me. He DOES!! that's crazyy! i can never ever comprehend His love, can i?

He loves me just the way i am, but He loves me enough not to leave me the way i am..

How great is His love lavished upon us. I love you Lord..

under construction..
beryl

Horrible

Ever felt the deep guilt that accompanies your sin? Remember how much sorrow and regret it brought? Shame and disappointment with yourself? Yet knowing that God freely forgives and removes our transgressions ..as far as from the east to the west?

I felt so horrible today..I spent my whole weekend preparing a sermon for the youth. I had plans to do my readings for Pentateuch and New Testament class on Sunday after church. When Sunday came, i spent the afternoon at Matt and Diana's baby shower. I thoroughly enjoyed it..after which i spent my evening watching a movie with Tom, Matt and Diana..and talked the rest of the evening through. By the time i reached home, i was dead tired.

Is that sin? No i don't think so..but it's the same emotions i feel when i sin! I went up to Dr. Seif, my lecturer and asked if i can write a paper to make up for my late and UNDONE readings. He gave me a half-joking, half-accusing look and asked me why i didn't do my readings. He gave me grace..said that i could write a little something about 1 & 2 Timothy that i was supposed to read. I walked out that class with my head down. i felt so HORRIBLE!!! almost disgusted with myself. "too hard on myself?" i don't think so! i should have done it even if i have to sacrifice some sleep!!

oh well.."it's all good" like Sarah, my roomie would say. This leaves me with today's readings, Wednesday's readings, Friday's readings, and a paper to write. I should stop venting?? sigh...

I, Berylynn Pheng Pheng Yeoh WILL NEVER MISS MY READING ASSIGNMENTS EVER AGAIN!! .......... amen! =)

not giving up..
pheng

Acres Of Hope

Acres Of Hope
Shane & Shane

He will allure her
He will pursue her
And call her out
To wilderness with flowers in His hand
She is responding
Beat up and hurting
Deserving death
But offerings of life are found instead

She will sing
She will sing
Oh, to You
She will sing as in the days of youth
As You lead her away
To valleys low
To acres of hope
Acres of hope

Here in the valley
Walk close beside me
Don't look back
For love is growing vineyards up ahead
You have called me master
And though you're in the dark here
Call me friend
And call me lover and marry me for good

She will sing
She will sing
Oh, to You
She will sing as in the days of youth
As You lead her away
To valleys low
To acres of hope
Acres of hope

How the story ends is
Love and tenderness in Him
Not safe, but worth it
So the valley? up ahead
Or the ones we live
We'll sing together
We'll sing together

We will sing
We will sing
Oh, to You
We will sing as in the days of youth
As You lead us away
To valleys low
To acres of hope
Acres of hope


Lord, sustain me in the valley. Give me ears to hear Your sweet tender voice and lead me in to acres of hope in this dry and weary land.?"Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her. There I will give her back her vineyards, and will make the Valley of Achor a door of hope. There she will sing as in the days of her youth, as in the day she came up out of Egypt. In that day, declares the LORD, you will call me 'my husband'; you will no longer call me 'my master. (Hosea 2:14-16)


"I am so passionate about you, that I shun you not when you stray away, but I will gently draw you close to Me again. I will do anything to win your heart..I have given you life in My Son. Walk with me, come hold my hand and walk with me. I am all that you will ever need...I LOVE YOU"-God

Spring Break

I just finished my Mid Terms this week! Glad that it's now Spring Break for a week. I won't be working at all for this week..both at starbucks and at the library. so, i get to rest a little, and crank up my engine to do more readings again when the spring break ends.

also, i may be going to classes from 800-1200pm every weekday this week to just sit for Systematic Theology class by Dr. Seif (my all-time FAV teacher) i don't need the credits but i just want to learn MORE from him as much as i can. He's sooooooo brainy. i wonder how a brain can store so much knowledge and wisdom! God is GREAT!!

also..i'm excited because a very gorgeous good friend of mine will be here for the Spring break! in fact, he's arriving tonight!! who else??..MIMI!! also, i'm having Danielle over at my little 'house' for two nights while she and her dad (Mr. Chuck) checks out CFNI. and thennnnn....Pr. Mike will be visiting for a week too, arriving this Thursday!! hahahha...this is sooo cool! i'm excited..

..and a little tired too. i should go..have a good one~

precious one..beryl

Art

The highest artist, in the eyes of the Jewish teachers of all generations, is not the greatest master in self-expression, but in self-control; he who fashions himself into a sanctuary. Such a view sounds strange in modern ears. One of the saddest phenomena of the age is the misuse of Art for the perversion of Youth. Art is divine and must be divinely used. When the Hebrew spirit prevails over the Greek, he strips it of its pagan sensuality, so that its beauty stands revealed untarnished by barbaric or ungodly association (Soloman J. Soloman)

If you're amazed at the paragraph above..don't be deceived! =) i wished i wrote that BUT i didn't. *grin* i was reading for my Pentateuch class and this is the Jewish commentary on the part when the artists were labouring on the building of the Tabernacle.

I really like this passage and absolutely LIKE how he worded it so beautifully and with so much truth! Hmmm...*think about it*

pheng..

Nooma

I really should be taking a nap (haha..like it's a necessity) but i am fascinated by the short clips in this website. i watched one of it in my class today..titled "luggage". If you have time or any interest at all..go check it out! http://www.nooma.com/

pheng

Baby

Hey..was thinking, I now have TWO darlings. So i should also show you all the other niece of mine..newly born baby on the 28th of Jan 2006! woohoooo!!!! Her name is Eloise Khaw Kai Ling. Felicia's name is Felicia Khaw Kai Xin. In this picture, I think she's just a week old. I wonder how much she's changed by now. Anyway..


Aaaaaahhhh.... =))

Hot Chicks

Yo peeps! I was just looking at my niece-Felicia's pictures. And this is my favourite pic. Felicia is almost 1 year and a month old!! The other hot chick in the picture is my beloved, CRAZEEE sister, Emily..or lovingly known as "ah yee". Don't you think this is such a nice picture??!!

Disclaimer: This is an aunt-niece picture. Not her mummy laa...

Blessings..berylynn

Heart's Cry

Though i'm as sheep prone to wonder,
This is my yearning as I ponder..

I will RUN, I won't CRAWL,
Until I hear the call,
I will STAND, I won't FALL,
Until I see the Lord!

berylynn

His Calling

Just today itself..i sense God speaking to me about His calling. No specifics actually..but just his nudging and challenging my heart about calling, His calling on my life.

Before Moses spent his 40 years in the desert tending sheep, he already had such passion and burden in his heart to deliver his fellow Hebrew brethen from slavery..though his heart's desire didn't translate into actions quite right! And after 40 years, when God appeared to him and told him to lead His people out of Egypt, he REFUSED! after all that 'bargaining' with God, he SURRENDERED to God's call.

In those 40 years, i believe his passion to deliver his people didn't fade away. God uses that passion and desire in Moses and calls him to do just that! MANY times, God calls us to do something that we already have the heart and passion to. imagine trying to pick up a lump of clay with a huge magnet..it won't budge. but now, picture picking another lump of clay that has magnet inside!! Our passion in our hearts are there for a PURPOSE, HIS purposes!

Never allow people to limit you with their theology or unbelief that you will never achieve your dreams or your deepest heart's desire. Don't let their unbelief and ideals box you in. God is so much BIGGER. He has even BIGGER dreams than we have..MOST of the time. =)

I look back on my life and thank God that i did NOT give up on my dream of going abroad to further my tertiary education..both in theology and secular. more than just a few people have discouraged my seemingly impossible dream, FEW have cheered me on. i'm glad i hung on to His promise..because i know and i know it is from Him!

so where do i go from here? i've some more dreams in my heart which still seem BIG to me right now. but i'm gonna trust the Dream Giver..because He will bring it to pass in His time!

if you're reading this entry, my encouragement to you as God encouraged me, DON'T GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS!! NEVER NEVER NEVER GIVE UP!!!

Thank you Lord..i'm grateful..truly grateful that you put dreams in my heart. Help me steady the course as I run for you.

Your child..berylynn

Today

Yesterday is history, today is an opportunity and tomorrow is the future. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow is blind and today is alive. Make the best out of it. Live life to the fullest by enjoying it because tomorrow will be a different day.

This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalm 118:24)

‘Yesterday is a cancelled cheque; tomorrow is a promissory note; today is ready cash – use it’ (Kay Lyons)

Today is not yesterday nor tomorrow. Today is your most precious possession. It is your only sure possession. The word ‘Today’ appears in the Scripture about 212 times. When it comes to decision-making, the Scripture always speaks of today and not tomorrow or the past.

Therefore God again set a certain day, calling it Today, when a long time later he spoke through David, as was said before: "Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts." (Heb 4:7)

If you are not aligned to him, today is the day to do it. If you have strayed away from him, today is the day for you to re-align with him.

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Matt 6:34)

Today is a brand new day. Let no fears creep in today from yesterday’s failures, shame or self loathe because God’s grace has wiped them out and worked to turn them into something good.

Today is an important day. It arrives fresh, offering new hopes and new dreams. Today is your day. Make the best out of it. Don’t put off doing what you want to do today because you never know what tomorrow brings. It is living today and not tomorrow that counts. By living your life one day at a time, you live all the days of your life.

For yesterday is already a dreamAnd tomorrow is only a visionBut today, well lived,Makes every yesterdayA dream of happiness,And every tomorrow a vision of hopeLook well, therefore to this day!Such is a salutation of the dawn!

~ If you miss the sunrise I made for you today, never mind. I’ll make you another one tomorrow – God ~

Sorry

If you've read my previous angry post, i want to apologize for my venting..actually, not so much of the venting but rather my heart and attitude behind it. i realised that in saying what i said in my previous blog, i am making myself look good or better than others. yes, i was VERY mad and i wrote what i wrote when i was still very angry. but that should NOT be an excuse..i should not even vent publicly in the first place. at least that's what i think. so..yeah. i'm sorry.

if all this doesn't make any sense at all. it's alright, i'm gonna delete my previous post anyway.

=) beryl

I LOVE YOU..

Just an article my sis sent me. I'm glad she send me only good and meaningful articles! =)


After 21 years of marriage, my wife wanted me to take another woman out to dinner and a movie. She said, "I love you, but I know this other woman loves you and would love to spend some time with you."

The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit was my MOTHER, who has been a widow for 19 years, but the demands of my work and my three children had made it possible to visit her only occasionally.

That night I called to invite her to go out for dinner and a movie. "What's wrong, are you well?" she asked. My mother is the type of woman who suspects that a late night call or a surprise invitation is a sign of bad news. "I thought that it would be pleasant to spend some time with you," I responded.
"Just the two of us?" She thought about it for a moment, and then said, "I would like that very much."

That Friday after work, as I drove over to pick her up I was a bit nervous. When I arrived at her house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be nervous about our date. She waited in the door with her coat on. She had curled her hair and was wearing the dress that she had worn to celebrate her last wedding anniversary. She smiled from a face that was as radiant as an angel's. "I told my friends that I was going to go out with my son, and they were impressed," she said, as she got into the car. "They can't wait to hear about our meeting."

We went to a restaurant that, although not elegant, was very nice and cozy. My mother took my arm as if she were the First Lady. After we sat down, I had to read the menu. Her eyes could only read large print. Half way through the entries, I lifted my eyes and saw Mom sitting there staring at me. A nostalgic smile was on her lips. "It was I who used to have to read the menu when you were small," she said. "Then it's time that you relax and let me return the favor," I responded.
During the dinner, we had an agreeable conversation - nothing extraordinary but catching up on recent events of each other's life. We talked so much that we missed the movie. As we arrived at her house later, she said, "I'll go out with you again, but only if you let me invite you." I agreed.
"How was your dinner date?" asked my wife when I got home. "Very nice, much more so than I could have imagined," I answered.

A few days later, my mother died of a massive heart attack. It happened so suddenly that I didn't have a chance to do anything for her. Some time later, I received an envelope with a copy of a restaurant receipt from the same place mother and I had dined. An attached note said: "I paid this bill in advance. I wasn't sure that I could be there; but nevertheless, I paid for two plates - one for you and the other for your wife. You will never know what that night meant for me. I love you, son."
At that moment, I understood the importance of saying in time: "I LOVE YOU" and to give our loved ones the time that they deserve.

Nothing in life is more important than your family. Give them the time they deserve, because these things cannot be put off till "some other time."

HOT!!

My tummy feels HOT inside because I ate Indian food in Sam Thecka's house today. Hahahhahaaa..i'm so happy and blessed. Yummy...it's gonna take me a while to get over this..hahhahahaa..love it!

We may be going to an Indian restaturant to eat this Sat for a special occasion. muahahhahahahaaaa!!!!!!!!!!

INDIAN FOOD ROCKS!

beryl

Cemetry Marker

i found this today..enjoy!!

Some time ago, a man was trying to trace his family origin. In the process of his research he visited several cemeteries collecting information from the markers. At one place he came across a monument with the following inscription:

Pause now stranger, as you pass by
As you are now, so once was I
As I am now, so soon you’ll be
Prepare yourself to follow me

Next to the marker, he noticed someone had placed a board with the following words:

To follow you
I’m not content
Until I know which way you went!


"follow me as i follow Christ"
Where are You heading after life?? ....lynn

Tired

I'm soooo tired. It's 4am..and i'm still not done preparing sermon for Monday. my neck is sore..i'm sleepy. Oh God help me! If anyone's reading this..please pray for strength and revelation. Thank you so much..

zzzzz....beryl

Antartica!!

since yesterday, the shower heater in our whole apartment complex decided to fail us. i couldn't wash my hair yesterday!! and today, the heater still didn't work!! and mind you, the water is ICE COLD and the temperature outside is 43F outside now, and bout 73F tomorrow morning. so earlier, when i came back from dinner..i decided to be a brave soul to take a shower!! within a minute standing under the shower, i was shaking like a drug addict in need of another dosage. it was crazeee COLD!!

later this evening, my roomies asked me if i took a shower. i told them i did with the cold water and they were appalled. the "are you out of your mind??" look was all over their faces, in fact they were so shocked they didn't speak until after a few seconds!! hahahahahaaa..they said i was so brave! :p to me, i just had no other options. it's almost like the Israelites crossing the Red Sea..even if they had no faith that the sea would part, they had the huge army coming after them as their 'faith encourager'. there simply isn't any choice left is there? hahahahaa, that's what i felt in my case too. i just had to bath or i wont even sleep on my clean bed.

pheww..i hope the heater works tomorrow! =) *fingers crossed*

beryl